We-Vibe Wish

This toy had so much promise. An adorable blue, funky shaped, squishy vibe that boasted similar strength to a wand style toy, but without the handle. A total dream. But did it deliver? Fuck no. Epiphora basically said it best when she described the We-Vibe Wish as the toy version of a dude who thinks he knows how to get you off better than you do. The inconsistent vibration patterns and lack of power that We-Vibe promised with the Wish are the toy’s downfall, so I’m almost disappointed to admit that it’s a toy I’m gonna keep charging and using for one particular reason…

HOW THIS TOY WORKS
The We-Vibe Wish is 4.1 inches long and 2.6 inches wide at the widest point. It’s shaped somewhat like an asymmetrical teardrop, or if you’re a fan of PBS kids, kinda like a dragon scale from Dragon Tales. It comes in a sky blue and is covered in squishy silicone. There’s a single button on the bottom next to magnetic charging nubs (which are the same as the Nova). After charging, pushing the button once will bring you to the lowest Power Pulse setting, which YOU’D HOPE would NOT be a pattern. I guess technically it’s not because it’s the power RANDOMLY going between the two motors but damn. You get this on the next two pushes as well but stronger. Settings 3-7 are patterns and, on the 8th button push, the Wish turns off. Like many of We-Vibe’s other toys, holding down the button for a few seconds will turn off the toy and, when you turn it back (if you haven’t charged it), it will remain on the same setting as when you turned it off. You can also control the Wish with We-Vibe’s app.

HOW I USE THIS TOY
First of all, the button (singular) is decidedly not intuitive. I genuinely have no idea what setting I am ever on. Sometimes the Wish seems like it has only one setting and sometimes it seems like it has all eleven. I just don’t know. Beyond having a mind of its own when it comes to randomly deciding which pattern to be on, the stupid Power Pulse technology likes to flicker back and forth between the motors with no rhyme or reason. Just! Be! Reliable! Please? The way to solve both these problems is to use the Wish with WeConnect, an app designed by We-Vibe (the app is actually not half bad and I go more in depth in my Nova review). However, most of the time, I have ZERO interest in controlling my sex toys with my phone; the most my phone should be doing is helping me find masturbation fodder. Instead, when I decided to work on this review, the first thing I did was create a ‘pattern’ I named “REGULAR” which was just a straight line across the screen. And ugh! My partner couldn’t even USE that pattern while he tried to get me off via the app on vacation, he could only use the garbage pre-designed patterns and, yes, they were all patterns.1I do not like patterns. Not even one stable option for me to try getting off with, let alone something reliable for my partner to use on me from afar.

Normally, my jerking off involves laying on my back but Wish doesn’t work with that. I am transported to teenage days of jerking off humping pillows and shitty things that vibrate but are decidedly not vibrators. The plushy cushioning on Wish means it doesn’t feel as directly powerful as something like We-Vibe’s Tango (even though it has TWO of the same motors!), so I have to literally use all my body’s weight to push into the vibrations. I don’t absolutely hate it but I have never thought “hm, I’d love to hump something and use my muscles to jerk off!”If you’ve ever read any of my reviews, you know I’m lazy. Why would I ever want to use any of my muscles except the ones inside my vagina??

But here’s the thing: this toy is the best thing I’ve found for a particular style of sex I like having. I never come without clitoral stimulation so if my partner’s cock is longer, their pubic bone doesn’t grind against my clit and it’s really fucking hard to cum. I’ve used the Magic Wand and I’ve used Tango, but neither quite works. 

The former gets in the way of me making out with whoever is banging me, and the latter has to be grasped but gets super slippery when lube and bodily fluids are involved. The Wish is squishy enough that it’s not annoyingly in the way (though partners don’t super love it), while being powerful enough to actually help out. It is a stupid toy… except that it fits really nicely between bodies and also vibrates my clit enough that I can have an orgasm. Should you spend $129 just for this?Not unless you really want a toy you can hump that can be controlled from anywhere in the world. It’s very niche.

Get it for $142 CAD from Come As You Are; $120 from Peepshow Toys; $123 from Vibrant, SheVibe, or Betty’s Toy Box; for $129 from The Pleasure Chest, Lovehoney, Luvoqa, or directly from We-Vibe.

LUBE & CLEANING
This toy is covered completely in silicone, which can bond with silicone based lube. I recommend a water based lube so you don’t run the risk of ruining your toy.

The We-Vibe Wish charges magnetically and is submergible, so it can be fully submerged for cleaning with soap and water. If you like more intense cleaning, you can drop it into a 10% bleach solution, then rinse it thoroughly with water.

PROs:

  • Good for clitoral stimulation during penis-in-vagina, missionary style sex
  • Okay power when it’s not deciding for you
  • App compatible

CONs:

  • Not really that good for anything besides humping and missionary
  • Too expensive to be this confusing
  • Why all the fucking patterns??

This toy was purchased with my own money, and I am not receiving anything in exchange for this review. There are affiliate links included. If you like this blog and want to support the work I do, please consider clearing your cookies and purchasing through my affiliate links.

Footnotes   [ + ]

1. I do not like patterns.